Tip 36: Replacing Punishment with Positive Opposite in Parenting

In our ABC Parenting, we have gone through Antecedents (A) and behavior ( changing tools such as shaping, simulation and models. Today, we focus on Consequences (C). What do we do if a child complies or do not comply with our prompts? Do we reward or punish?

When our kids put on negative behaviors we tend to use punishment to change them. But punishment temporarily stops behavior, they don’t change behavior. We can use positive opposite instead of Punishment.

We use positive opposite to get rid of the behavior we don’t want to see in our child: catch the child doing good and reward or praise it. In other words, we may ignore negative behavior and focus on the opposite of that behavior, the positive behavior. Anytime you see a little glimpse of the opposite of the negative, praise it.

*Procedure of Positive Opposite*

1. Identify and state the negative behavior you don’t like. *For example, my kid is not brushing his teeth before sleeping*

2. Identify and state the positive opposite of that behavior

*My kid must brush his teeth before sleeping*

3. Observe for a little effort of it to happen.

* The kid takes tooth brush and paste.*

We will praise it as: Great, you have taken brush and paste, then a touch. You can also reward the kid with points if you have the point system in place.

Anytime the positive happens praise it till it becomes a habit

Kindly note that this behavior tool can be applied on adults to change their behaviors. Leaders are advised to use it in their work place.

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